I love hearing people’s stories. And stories are great because they help us remember concepts and themes (usually through the emotions they make us feel) and they connect us as humans. And we all need to connect on a human level.Read More
Connection with others is a funny thing, isn’t it? Most of us are surrounded by lots of people at any one time. I live in an apartment surrounded by at least 1,000 people in a fairly small area but do I connect with them? Do I truly know them, and do we have meaningful conversations? I can’t say that the few conversations at the playground or pool fall into this category. What about if you work, or are involved with your children’s school or maybe a sporting or community group? How often is there time and space to stop and be present with the people we come into contact with every day? Not that often I say.
This is why it’s important to take a little time out every now and then and do something (on purpose) that makes us stop and breathe and connect. It's why I decided to organise an event for International Women’s Day in Singapore. As well as wanting to recreate the events I have often attended in Sydney , I wanted to reconnect with my Singapore network after moving back here in January and meet some new people.
International Women's Day (March 8) is a global day celebrating the social, economic, cultural and political achievements of women. The day also marks a call to action for accelerating gender parity. What could be a better excuse then to come together with others, enjoy a beautiful lunch and relax amongst the greenery and orchids of the Singapore Botanical Gardens, while hearing from two unique and remarkable women contributing to the Singapore community?
Carolyn Milligan (Global Head of Mobility, Kantar Group), and Annette Tillbrook (Board Member, AustCham Singapore) will share their unique stories on how they have developed their career and are making their mark in Singapore. It’s through sharing stories that we all grow.
British born Carolyn heads up the Global Mobility function within the Kantar Group (part of the WPP Group , the world’s largest communications services group comprising over 179,000 employees globally). Her main achievements include supporting and partnering with the business to enable their Talent Agenda with the 300+ relocations that take place every year.
In addition to working full time and raising twin daughters, Carolyn supports, mentors and organises Singapore ‘Foreign Domestic Worker’ beauty pageants. She takes pride in supporting these women who find themselves away from their support networks, often vulnerable or lacking in confidence, and requiring coaching and support on everyday matters that others take for granted.
Aussie Annette has a long history of helping Australian businesses through her work with AustCham, the Australian business community in Singapore. AustCham fosters, and provides a forum for business links between Australia and Singapore by connecting members to business and government through hosting, facilitating and providing events and services for members. Annette will talk to us about her role in developing AustCham into the organisation it is today, and her challenges and successes throughout her career.
Along with lunch, great company and inspiring speakers we will be raising money for aidha, a Singapore based charity who do great work in providing financial literacy programmes such as money management, computer literacy, leadership and entrepreneurial skills for foreign domestic workers and lower-income women.
Sounds good doesn’t it? Grab a friend and come along. Get your tickets here
Me! Me! *hand waving madly in the air*
'strike a pose, there's nothing to it'
Hands up who hates getting their photo taken?
Sigh. Yep me too.
Maybe it’s not so much the photo being taken as the end result. Do you think?
You see I don't think I'm particularly photogenic and more and more I wish I had better photos of me, for my blog, and my social media profiles, like LinkedIn, Facebook and Instagram. I’m also asked to provide headshots for marketing purposes, when I speak at events. My favourite headshot was taken by one of my friends and all-time great photographer AndreaThompson nearly six years ago! I’m sure when people meet me in the flesh now it’s a bit of a disappointment because I probably don’t look like that anymore!
So last week while wasting time perusing my Facebook feed, up popped some recent photographic work by Pru Aja. You should check out her work here. Go look. I can wait. Don't you wanna look that good? I do.
I met Pru at the Business Chicks Movers and Breakers conference in Byron Bay last October and starting following her on Facebook after that. She has a great career story and I just love her work. She does a range of work in the fashion and corporate space but I particularly love her personal branding work. It is glamorous and beautiful and colourful and seems to really capture the personality of the person she is photographing. I want some photos like that. Ones that reflect my style and my fashion sense.
We got chatting on Facebook and then had a Skype call (cause she is in Melbourne and I’m like not) and well, I think I may have convinced her to come to the little red dot and take some photos of me. I’m redesigning my blog and working on other bits and pieces and need some good shots. Ones that are a bit sexy and cool and fun and fashion-nee. You know?
I'm sure there are lots of women in my network in Singapore who would like the same. Beautiful photos for work and business purposes or maybe just to have some photos that make you look and feel great. So here’s your chance. She's coming in April and if you are interested you should contact Pru for more information. She has a few different options she can discuss with you as well as how the process works. I’m already pulling together a pinterest board with some looks I like!
I have been noticing various International Women's Day events being advertised on my social media accounts in Australia, and feeling a bit like I was missing out on things. You see, I have been to many such events in previous years both in Australia and Singapore, and they are really nice. Often a lunch or something over cocktails with some hard truths about the current state of gender parity (with some appalling stats to illustrate) but also with some amazing and inspirational women, some who tell their story in front of the group and others you learn about through the networking these events provide. It's great for your soul.
Business chicks are having a Sydney and a Melbourne event and Women in Focus have events all over the place making my gills-go-all-green with wanting to go to one. But I have just moved back to Singapore and because I'm not working at the moment it's not likely I'm going to be invited to an event run by one of the big companies in Singapore, because a) they don't have my contact details and b) because I'm not a client who makes them money. Sigh.
So after some Thursday afternoon reflections I'm going to run my own event. An event that I would be delighted to attend, over a reasonably priced lunch, with perhaps a small glass of bubbles in a nice setting. I'm going to have some interesting speakers and invite all my network of fabulous women and their friends. Imagine the energy!
It will be a no-profit exercise that raises money for one of the local Singapore charities that does great work for women in the community and because I want to give back to a country that took me back!
Sounds good doesn't it?
Wanna come? Wednesday 8 March is the date. Stay tuned for more details....
photo credit: Pexels
In the evening, sitting on our balcony back in August 2014, Singapore seemed a wondrous place. We were surrounded by the lights of condominiums around us, housing hundreds, probably thousands of people. It made me feel small, but not in a bad way. I was one of many expatriates lucky enough to be living and working in this place.
Singapore is a place of contradictions. It is dominantly Chinese but also Western, along with influences from Malaysia, India and Indonesia. It is high tech but also not. It is innovative and creative and so, so not. Singaporeans are generally friendly and helpful but can also be closed and private. It is a country of opportunity for Expats but barriers also exist, which can be trying.
When the universe decided that my career in the UK would be short lived we had to make a decision about where to live, barely two months after moving to the UK. The decision process was long and fraught. Staying in the UK required moons to align, which as far as 2016 was going did not happen. Did we want to go home? To Australia, a country with a barely moving economy and to a place with questionable politics and increasingly conservative views? Though a place with beautiful beaches and friends and a place that is familiar and easy?
Or did we want to stay overseas for longer? After 6 months of some harrowing and stressful times Australia did seem like a good option. But would it be giving up? Giving up on the experience of different cultures and feeling like you were giving up on the opportunity to experience different things in our career that are not available in Australia? And also giving up on providing our kids with a multicultural view of the world?
In December 2016 we changed our mind constantly about where we were moving to. We had decided that we would leave the country mid-January 2017, but apart from that we didn't know. We were applying for jobs and searching for opportunities in Australia, Asia (Singapore and Hong Kong) and the Middle East. We had a deadline of 5 January 2017 to tell the removalists where to send out stuff! Man did we flip-flop on the decision! For a few days it looked like we were going to Abu Dhabi, and then for the next week to Sydney and then our visa's for Singapore got approved so without any firm job offer from anywhere we made the decision to move to Singapore.
So why? Well it was the place we lived in before the UK, so the most familiar. It seemed to have the best job opportunities for both Arran and I, and we have some great friends here. The International schools are really good and had vacancies and we wanted the boys to be able to return to something familiar after the previous six months of upheaval. The weather is warm, the lifestyle is good and the food! Oh my, this country has the best variety of the most amazing food going. The low tax rate and availability of relatively cheap help in the home may have also swayed us!
So here we are.....just two Aussies with six months to find a job! Wish us luck.
2016 was a shitty year in my book and I'm glad to see the back of it. Man! It seems like many people agree by the look of all my social media accounts. Great people passed away, some before their time like Prince and Gene Wilder (oh Charlie) and Alan Rickman and Muhammad Ali and David Bowie and many, many more great people. Then there was Brexit and the US election and awful things in Syria and so much stuff. I must have known something because my word for the year was "strength". I can't say I lived up to it but it was obviously a good choice. Sigh.
I was all psyched up to go on a big whinge on 2016 in this post but decided that things have been so shit that I didn't really know where to start and because no one close to me died or was seriously sick I decided to let it all go. How adult.
Instead of a big whinge the no-one appreciates I thought I would tell you about what I'm looking forward to in 2017. Let's see......
- Moving from the UK to somewhere else. To be honest I didn't really want to be here and not exactly sure what possessed me to move here. I have written a post about moving here but it may remain in draft because. Will see. However lets just say I like warm weather. I do.
- Moving to Singapore or Sydney. Might be good to know where but I don't. I seem to be getting better with ambiguity while friends we have made here in the UK are freaking out. Decision has to be made by January 3 2017 which should be plenty of time, shouldn't it? I thought the decision was made last week. And two weeks ago. And a month ago. Still in limbo land. Come on universe! Make a decision. We are grateful we have the opportunity to live in either place. Both are awesome amazing places to live and we have great friends in both locations.
- I'm going to redesign my blog and move it to a new platform that is self-hosted. It will give me more flexibility and options. I'm looking forward to something fresh, something cool, something sexy. Cause I like sexy. Stay tuned.
- Potentially trying something different. Feeling a little jaded from working for large US companies for the past 9 years. Working somewhere with purpose and soul could be for me. Or working for myself could be on the cards, depending on where we end up.
- I'm going to give writing a go, a little more seriously.
- Moving on. Being in a different place doing different things. Making new connections and contemplating life. Creating opportunities to be more creative.
- Planning new holidays in new places.
- By a long shot is My Top 7 Interview Tips. It has three times more reads than any other post! I think it has something to do with the stress that people go through trying to secure a new job.
- Breadth and Depth in your career: I really like this post myself and have also spoken about this to leadership development groups. There is something about doing generalist roles and then specialist roles and mixing it up in terms of companies you work for to gain a variety of experiences.
- Managing your career: keeping your mind fit: Look Mum I'm a health blogger! No just kidding. But some things that work for me.
- There's obviously lots of crap managers out there because this post made the top 5
- And at number 5 making a two parent family work is obviously on the mind of many and is my most recent post to make the top 5. Some tips that could work for you.
I found it really helpful seeing how others managed going back to work after maternity leave, and thought this post might also be helpful for others in the juggle. Also, this is something I should write about because I think women should work. Full time. But it ain't easy and if you can see how others do it them maybe you can work it out too.
So here's how Arran and I did it when we lived in Sydney when Aiden was 3-5 years old and Charlie was 1-3 years old. This was probably the most challenging time in our family life, and after I accepted a big job that required lots of travel domestically and internationally, it got more crazy. Arran was also working on his international cycling career.
This is how we did it but I'm sure there are lots of ways you could manage this situation so if you have any other suggestions I would love to hear them.
First things first
Both kids were either in full-time childcare, or when Aiden started school he was in before and after school care. Thinking I was going to save money on childcare when Aiden started school was wrong people. I had to spend the same amount on before and after school care!
A side note on childcare: Aiden and Charlie are both happy well adjusted kids who have now moved countries twice and I can say that child care didn't hurt them and probably helped them a lot. They were lucky to be in a great childcare centre with fantastic staff. They are both robust, make friends easily and are now doing well in school.
The weekday routine
Arran would get up early each morning, around 5am, and do a big training ride on the way to work. He would start work at around 7.30am. I would dress, get breakfast and take the boys to childcare and/or school. That sounds easy if you say it fast, but usually by the time I got to work I had been up for nearly 4 hours. I arrived at work, somewhere between 8.30 and 9am, in a pretty frazzled state. Trying to get dressed, do your hair and make-up with two small kids at your feet is not a relaxing start to the day. There would usually be a tantrum from one or both kids at breakfast, and Charlie would do a big poo in his nappy just as I was trying to get them into the car. I would have an internal debate about either changing his nappy or pretending to the child care centre that it happened in the car. Yes, bad mummy.
The last 6 months in Sydney there were two different drop offs, Aiden at school and Charlie at childcare and let me tell you doing that in the middle of Sydney peak hour traffic is not fun. Arran was having a lovey bike ride while I was trying not to lose my mind.
Once I was at work I could happily work until 6 or 6.30pm without stressing about having to pick up the kids. The later it gets in the day the better I work.
Arran needed to do the opposite in the afternoons. He needed to leave work at 4.30pm so he could pick up Aiden and Charlie on his bike. He would head home and hitch up the bike chariot and then head off to childcare and school before they shut at 6pm which was pretty tight. He was responsible for getting their dinner and bathing them, though I was usually home for bathing and bedtime. Just getting Charlie dry after a bath was a two person job! That kid was wiggly.
We could swap routines if needed and one of us could drop-off's and pick-ups if the situation required. I think the key is to be flexible when things come up.
|Charlie was in the chariot and Aiden in the seat on the back. Arran on the fat bike. Sydney to Wollongong event|
And what would happen if one of the kids was sick, which happened often, cause they were little and at a childcare centre or school with lots of other germ producing and spreading kids? Well that was a negotiation. It depended on what Arran or I had on that day. What meetings were scheduled and what deadlines had to be met? If I didn't have much on I would work at home. Or if I had been travelling a lot I would look after the sick kid. I was lucky that I had trust and flexibility in my job. Arran would do a bit of the same. One day when Charlie was sick I had an important meeting in the morning, so Arran stayed home and then we switched so Arran could attend a meeting in the afternoon. Pretty crazy but that's how we worked it.
When Aiden was more little and sick I could sometimes take him to work. I had my own office where I could stash him and he was a really good kid. I would take an iPad and a little sleeping bag and he would entertain himself and sleep. Not many people can do this though and probably not a practical suggestion. I could never take Charlie to work. He was just too high maintenance! Lucky he's cute.
|Aiden watching out the window for trains and watching his iPad in my office|
|Aiden asleep on my office floor|
I am still the default parent which is kind of annoying.
Things that helped
- Having childcare and school in relatively close proximity to either home or work. Ours were close to home which meant it was easy for both of us to get to. If the child care is near one of the parents work, guess which person is dealing with drop offs and pick ups?
- Having a really good cleaner. Our cleaner in Sydney was a godsend. She and her team came once a week and also stripped and made the beds with clean sheets. It's hard to find a good cleaner but you need to preservere in finding one as it makes life much easier. If two parents are working you should allocate money to this service. It's cheaper than psychological help, pharmaceuticals and divorce. Doing the same for a gardener when you would rather spend time doing other things.
- On a Sunday I would often make food for the kids or all of us that we could have for dinner during the week. I would make a huge pot of spaghetti bolognese (with lots of veggies hidden inside) and freeze in various portions so that we just had to boil some pasta. Or would make some meatballs and tomato sauce (also with veggies hidden). We would also have fresh or frozen ravioli the boys liked and fish fingers in the freezer so it was easy to prepare something if time was tight and the kids, and us, were tired. Luckily the boys childcare centre was in a shopping centre so it was easy to go to the supermarket to get dinner food on the fly if we were a bit disorganised (about half of the time).
- We had a combined washer-dryer which we had purchased to save space when we lived in a much smaller house, which took ages to wash and dry a load of washing (close to 7 hours), but this worked really well for us because we would put a load of washing on at night, shut the door of the laundry and the clothes were washed and dry in the morning.
- Arran would keep business shirts and suits at work and have them laundered and ironed or dry cleaned near work. I refuse to iron so my clothes either went to the drycleaner 50 metres from our house on Saturday morning or were hung on hangers to dry so they didn't need ironing.
- If my hair needed washing and 'doing' I would do it the night before and just touch up in the morning
- Arran exercised in the morning and I would go for a walk in the evenings after the boys were in bed.
- You have to let go of some stuff. You can't have a perfect house if you are both working and you can't do everything that childcare and schools ask parents to do. Lots of parents are in the same boat. You just have to do your best.
- We had some great friends in Sydney, who we now regard as family, who would kindly babysit if Arran and I wanted to go out for dinner.
Photo credit of our family on the beach http://www.andreathompson.com.au
I wrote about part-time work a few weeks ago and had a great response. Lots of comments and suggestions about how to get part-time work. One of the options is to job-share. Job sharing is a version of part-time work which involves two people 'sharing' the full-time hours of one job. The pay and other benefits are shared between the two on a pro-rata basis, by the hours each person works. I don't have much experience with job sharing so I asked my good friend Sarah Beck to help me out.
I met Sarah when we worked at the same company in Sydney, both in the Human Resources team. Sarah was job sharing then and is the only example I have experienced, which probably doesn't say much about the companies I have worked for, or me as a Human Resources professional!
Sarah moved to Singapore about 4 years before me and was the first person to take me out for coffee when I moved there. She was great at filling me in on dealing with frizzy hair and the medical conditions common to the tropics, as well as where to find the good coffee. Super helpful!
Sarah has recently moved to Chicago with her husband and today I interviewed her about how job sharing worked for her.
Say hello to Sarah! *waving*
Hi Sarah, firstly how did the job-sharing arrangement come about?
Could you tell us about how the job share worked? How many hours did each of you work and how did you agree this?
- Nothing much happens after these meetings. Leaders are supposed to go back to employees and give then give feedback on their performance and how they will be developed, and put a development plan together with the employee. In most cases this doesn’t happen.
- Sometimes the talent and succession planning only happens at a certain level of the organisation, leaving many employees out of the process
- Plans to fill capability gaps are usually put on hold because they cost money and there are other more pressing priorities.
- Even if all employees are reviewed in these closed room discussions, only a few may be targeted for development, because resources are limited.
Photo credit: Tim Gouw at www.pexels.com